By Josh Tolentino
Editor’s Note: The Hot Take is a satirical column that uses humor, irony and exaggeration to point out issues in society, on and off campus. The interviews are fictional, and any resemblance to any real person is coincidental.
Melanie Boyle’s common hour started with her finding a $25 ticket slapped on the windshield of her Mercedes S450. “This is outrageous,” she exclaimed, pulling out her dad’s checkbook.
A dilemma that most students never face, Boyle grieves. “My parents spent all this money on my $90,000 car now they have to pay for this ticket,” she complained. Boyle was ticketed by public safety for parking in a handicap parking space.
She believes there was a good reason for her actions. “I was in a handicap parking spot so I wouldn’t be late for class. No one uses them anyways,” she said.
Little did she know, her actions had consequences, as George Roberts, a student permitted to use the handicap space, had to park further from his class. “I had to park near Pratt and halfway through I was stranded in the parking lot,” he said.
Roberts, a sophomore physical therapy major, has relied on his parking spot to get to class, but because Boyle had to get her iced tai chi latte with herbal essence and moroccan oil at Starbucks, Roberts missed out on all his classes that day. “I was stuck in the lot all day, it hurts because I’m allergic to asphalt,” he said.
There’s a reason why parking tickets are in place. Actions have consequences and sometimes the needs of others do outweigh needs of the self. A lesson that Boyle has hopefully learned.